Hello! Welcome to Alitheia Dialegomai‘s classified section. Here you can post items that you might have for sale to be viewed by anyone who has access to the World Wide Web. Items can range from anything: from pop-up trailers to NASCAR memorabilia to old hockey jerseys — anything that you kind find in the back room of a double-wide trailer.
For example, say you have the winding found inside of a vintage electric engine and somebody from France just happened to be looking for that same item. Thanks to Alitheia Dialegomai and the wonders of technology in the 21st century you can post your advertisement, the Frenchy can do a search, and voilà, you’re both in business!
Only serious advertisements, please! This is not some forum for jokes!
And be sure that you use proper English when you comment.
Oh yeah, and if you’re from anywhere in the upper northeast, like New Jersey, then you can forget about posting on here. You are FORBIDDEN to post.
I have some Fidel Castro cigar butts, that were smoked by the man himself. I got them while I taxied him around New York City. I’ll sell them for $50 a piece, 4 total.
Finally …something we southern folk can
identify with! For Sale. Various papers,
projects and crib sheets used by graduates of prestigious Holiness Seminary.High grades
guaranteed! All graduates moved on to schools of higher learning in the North to
educate and mold other like thinkers.
Also pop up trailer is still available,along
with blue S 10 tow vehicle (no A/C).
3
Yeah, I got a Colt 4 smoke-machine for sale, kinda like the ones they got here. I’ll take $45, a field mule, a chester drawers, OBO.
Tell me, 3, how much you want for your S 10? You’d better not ask too much for it, its a Chevy and them things are made of junk!
-Rosco P.
4 Sale
Saw blades from my B & D Radial Arm Saw. Only a few teeth missing. Still got some life in ‘em. Good for cutting tubing and copper pipe. (ask R. Adkins)
Also, various chisels. Double as screwdrivers. Also good for chipping concrete and stone.
Blue Mazda pick-up for sale will take trade in on two bags of aluminum pop cans or a used violin.
Looking for a vintage NAPA 1/2″ ratchet. It doesn’t have to have all of the gears.
Yeah, I have a stack of old Ladies Home Journal magazines for sale. I will sell them for $.25 an issue or will trade straight up for any of those seminary papers 3 is selling.
Looking for a good southern janitor. Must have his own truck.
Call Whitey
For sale, set of 3 gasket scrapers. Have used them many times and they work great. Oh, wait…uh…actually I think these are wood chisels, but believe me they make good gasket scrapers.
Two TVs 4sale. Must be sold as a pair – top one has sound only and the bottom one has picture only. I will be willing to trade for the Blue Mazda but only if it comes with a bunch of assorted screws and nails.
4-Sale
Chevy S-10 parts vehicle. Rusted badly underneath. Broken door handles. Leaky sunroof. No A/C. Has toneau…ripped, but has roll of Duct tape for repairs. $1000 firm. Willing to trade for copper pipe.
Will deliver as far as Kentucky.
4 sale,
One 200 ton Dunham Bush chiller. Cool multiple doublewides (daisychain them suckers!). Made to run on 208V…make sure you use a big extension cord to prevent fires. I recommend a yellow over an orange cord. $100 OBO. Delivered by comany trailer. Must be assembled (torched in half).
Wes,Just what we need here at the Bible College.(OHIO) I assume it
would run off a dryer outlet? Please
advise.Would you folks consider a
trade,how about the letters off Moore
Hall?We could give you the r and the e. JJ
For Sale: Four 20 ton jacks used for leveling large buildings that have been condemned. Will trade for 20 tons of Yazoo clay.
Lost:
Seminary Boy, aka: “The Graham Cracker Leech.”
He preys on daughters to get home cooked meals.
Could be dangerous, definatly costly.
Bubba,
I will trade the Mazda truck for that there double-decker TV (Are they bunjied or screwed together). The truck already has a bed full of nail & screws, but I still want some scrap metal if not pop cans.
Double-decker TV…… HA!
Fore sell:
Eye half won bigg phat darey cow that I knead two cell too make some monie. Aye will cel it four know lesss then eleventeen dollers. Annie taikers?
Kentucky Wonder Boy,
The TVs are duck taped together. I figured if it would hold a NASCAR fender on at 200 mph then it was good enough to keep these TVs in place.
The only problem is that I don’t have any cans. They only thing I have is some old eletrical wiring. If you had a young boy though he could work at stripping it for you.
Bubba,
SOLD, I thank we got r selves a deal.
Two cribs (each holds two -three kids in Mississippi) available for aspiring seminary students looking to start the quest for fatherhood.
Concerned professors,
Do you have any kind of layaway program? Can I put down $5 up front and give you the rest in about 5-6 years?
Sean Scribner,
We are even more concerned because a lady, calling herself your wife, posted that she is not waiting 5-6 years for children. We wonder whose children we will have if you don’t buy our cribs and get started on that family
What are trying to suggest, Concerned Professors???
Single White Male with Chrohns looking for a single female preferably with teeth and without any digestive/gastro difficulties.
Wow,
Such a rare disease…Chrohn’s disease. So rare in fact, that they had to put another “h” in it to differentiate it from Crohn’s disease. So sad…so very sad. I feel for you…
Found:
Tall, white seminary student. Male, approximately late twenties, slightly malnourished. Frequently sighted in our driveway. Says he will date for food.
Could this be the “Graham Cracker Leech”. If so, please contact me.
Concerned SWF in Jackson
Anybody have any porcelain army figurines? How about a set of wind chimes?
I have a cannon ball that came from the Battle of the Bulge, and an M16 shell from the Civil War if anyone wants to trade.
Feldman,
So, you have a M16 shell from the Civil War…mmm. I would say that is very rare. How much you want fur it?
SWF-
You have reason to be concerned!!!
I believe you have found my Leech. Just to be certain use this test.
First, tell a very dumb joke (the dumber the better). If he looks aimlessly into the sky for approx. 5 seconds, and then a very high pitched laughter comes from his mouth, you have found my “Graham Cracker Leech”.
1st Seminary Momma
NRA, my name is “Feldman, from across the hall.” I don’t go around calling you “NR” do I?
Gosh.
Yes the M16 shell is very rare. Thomas Jefferson himself once owned it before he started on his Mount Rushmore project. He had to sell all his valuable relics from antiquity and thus this shell was passed down to my great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great grandfather. No wait, it was my great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great grandfather. Or was it my…… oh, never mind.
You can have it for $.25
1st Seminary Momma,Were you ever hit
in the head with a snowball? That will
explain your affection for wayward
males. 3
Fer Sail – beever skinz. Sum big and sum small. Can bee used fer makn nice hat or fer makn a twopay fer bald perfesors. Wil sail fer dolar eech or wil trade fer coon dowg.
Sean.Just an observation or correction.
In your intro you state no posts from
Jew Jersey ,I hope this is a typo.
3
LOL!!!
Oh my goodness, that was actually a total mistake. However, it is quite funny. I suppose though that I had better take it down — I don’t want to offend any “Jew” Jerseyans.
3-
My dating life is of no concern to you! I am simply trying to protect the innocent SWF’s in Jackson (if was a service to you, and yours). You can have the leech, he doesn’t seem to remember us anyway.
Jan,My that was a weak comeback concerning
my post,I wasn’t commenting on your dating
habits…though I find it strange you would
marry a cold blooded ground hog killer.
Plus it’s a happy day ,Junior won. 3
I have one front row ticket for Rod Parsly’s Sunday Morning Worship Service this Sunday only. This is rare, it won’t last long. Its a good place to get your “dance-on”. $200
Ah….Rod Parsley another famous Circleville
student,he can preach and doesn’t worry about offending our Muslem brothers. I,m
surprised they didn’t ask him to preach at
the Evangelical meeting Prof. Lees at,he’s
not far removed from the Nazarenes.
Third World
Third World, Rod Parsley is a Nazarene encloaked. We Methodists once wanted him but he turned out to be too conservative for us…
For Sale.
Eerdmans Pulpit Commentary 23 Vols.
Good Condition…..$125.00
Dr. Gilbert Price 601-847-2552 Office
601-847-2649 Home
1st Seminary Momma,
Have you ever heard of the popular funk band from the ’70′s, “War”? I didnt think so. They have this song called “Why can’t we be friends”. It’s really good. You should listen to it sometime.
Anyway, their song came to mind as I read your two, rather scathing emails. Ouch! Where is the love? (“Black Eyed Peas”…ever hear of them?)Don’t be a hata’ be a lova’. Peace.
Keepin the Gloves Up…
Graham Cracka
Help! Does anyone no if them books 4 sale
have pictures,I sure could use them for
my preaching.
babble tower
NASCAR is for women.
Hockey is for pansies.
Chevy trucks stink.
The Cowboys are the devil.
“Mr. Anonymous”,
Since it appears we are quoting songs, have you ever heard the song by Petra “This Means War!” Just wondering.
Looking for someone to mourn with since hockey is no longer on strike. Its a sad day…hockey is back.
“Graham Cracka”-
I too thought of a song, “Here’s a quarter, call someone who cares”
Do you need any cheese with all that whine?
It is good to know that you aren’t starving to death!
Yo momma
Bubba,
Petra is good… ok, was good. NASCAR IS BAD.
So is Dave Hunt.
And Toyota trucks are for sissies.
Oh yeah, I almost forgot: Dale Earnhardt Jr. is a cross-dresser.
Touché!
For sale: 50% of my brain which I’m not using now that I’m not in seminary. Priceless.
“Mr. Anonymous”,
Have you been getting enough sleep lately? You seem a bit cranky in your last couple of posts. In fact, it reminded me of my kids when they don’t get a nap. Of course, I have to admit that I would probably be cranky too if I drove a For Old Retired Drivers vehicle. Especially since it is always Found On Road Dead, which means I would have to Fix Or Repair Daily. That alone would be enough to make you cranky.
I just wanted to let you know I am concerned for you and that I will be praying for your emotional well being.
Bubba,
I’ll admit, your little word games are cute. But one thing we all need to remember is that “Shove-it-or-let-it-lay” (Chevrolet), owned by “G”eneric “M”alarkey, will NEVER be “F”irst “O”n “R”ace “D”ay.
And Dale Jr. is still a cross-dresser.
True ‘dat!
“F”irst “O”n “R”ace “D”ay?!
I would like to offer the following statistics for the general publics awareness and education:
2004 race winners:
Chevy – 22!
Ford – 10
2005 current standings:
Chevy – 10 (including four in a row)
Ford – 8
First when? Oh, you must have meant first looser. Sorry, my bad.
For Sale
W.W.R.D T-shirts.
In 2004 the maintenance dept lost its most valued employee to a teaching position at a Northen College (I guess he wanted to trade in his common sense for some nonsense). Yet, due to the absence of leadership that this created, we had to print these shirts so that we could be reminded to ask ourselve What Would Ron Do?
However, upon the hiring of Randy Belcher there has been a new level of quality and achievement that his expertise have brought to our dept.
We have found that he is an all-knowing expert in theology, pastoral ministry, counseling, fund raising, administration, student affairs, construction methods, maintenance know-how, interior decorating, painting, lighting, finish carpentry, flooring, control panel engineering, computers, software, and web pages and much, much more. Don’t believe me, just ask him. As a result, we now ask ourselves What Would Randy Do.
Due to Randy’s great weath of knowledge and experience these T-Shirts fit all occasions and any problems you may have. In fact, I think he even worked for NASA once. This shirt would be especially helpful for aspiring seminary students how will need assistance getting settled in and adjusted.
Shirts come in all sizes, but only in white and grey. Order fast, quantities are limited. We will ship them out as soon as recieve your cash, but only after we ask Randy how he would do it.
Notice.The pop-up trailer listed
earlier for sale is no longer
available.In process of conversion
to office space for new online personal.Thanks for your interest.
3
3,
Boy, that’s a shame. I’ve been saving up my hard-earned rupees to purchase that trailer. I was going to set my computer up in there and make it my own personal office space. But some lucky sped beat me to the punch….. lucky duck. I bet he’s one handsome guy too. Probably has women admiring him everywhere he goes. And I bet he’s real intelligent and witty as well. He’s probably the life of the party everywhere he goes.
Man, I wish I could be like that guy……….
Maybe one day
Sean, You missed the point,I guess I was
a little vague.The new office space(popup)
is for the new online staff members coming
in August. Never fear the popup has a 12000
Btu window unit and a chemical toilet! 3
3,
I understood you perfectly. I understand that someone else, probably very good looking and intelligent, is getting the popup trailer and I am not. I understand that nepotism runs rampant in Mississippi (afterall, everyone’s related, right?) and that the best things always go to the ones who look the best, are the smartest, have the most teeth, etc…. Look, if this new hotshot coming to work for the online program is so great, why don’t you just hook me up with him and we can have it out when I get down there. I’ll show him who’s boss….. believe you me!
Maintenace Foreman,
I would like to order a half dozen of those t-shirts for the montley crew…I mean maintenace crew here at the Northern college which I’m associated. They often work without shirts or their bib-overalls are worn without a shirt. Thanks for this opportunity. The money is in the mail.
P.S. Do they have a picture of your ace n them?
Are the proceeds from the t-shirt sale going to go towards the continued remodeling of ver-ities” wing?
If so, I’ll take four!
Dear Northern Prof 2, In regards to the
Veritas remodeling,the person returned this morning at 02:00 and did some more work.
We have our “ace” on the case and he is
wearing one of our custom T shirts while he
tracks down the perp.
3
Do any of you know where I can find a new slushy machine? Or how about a new microwave for our frozen burritos? I will trade you one 33 cent stamp.
Has anyone seen a college boy turned Seminarian. Seems to have a love for computers and extremely small furniture!
He just up and left and we miss him around here
Searching,
I’ll keep an eye out for him down here. The chances are I’ll meet him. We’ll have so much in common. I mean, I just finished college and just recently became a Seminarian. I too love computers, and even more ironically, I too had small office furniture. The odds are that our paths will cross, and when they do I’ll let you know.
Free for the taking:
Various oil paintings. Perfect for decorating bare office walls. Collection includes J. Calvin, M. Luther, and Cuba Gooding Jr. Great gift idea for the new employee.
Wanted: Untainted painting of J. Wesley.
Contact:
der Kaiser
Wanted.Willing and reliable worker
to replace recent new hire, who cut class and work to toil at the infamous
“Pumpkin Show”. YODA
FOR SALE. Worthless nut sent from Buckeye
State.Any trades considered including
“Coach of the Year Awards”. YODA
Check out this website:
http://www.ourwesleyanheritage.com
Needed in Circleville. Prospective Prof
needs hook up for popup camper.Please reply
if suitable arrangements can be made.Expect
arrival last week of May or 1st week in June
Texas Red
Dude,I’m glad you dumped them other
loser’s,they was just boggin you
down man.Use the smartest man I ever
read…rock on Calvin.Sure glad you
kept the classifieds.
Tryin to Think….